love

What Do Women Actually Want? Porn vs. Reality

What Do Women Actually Want?  Porn vs. Reality

VibeWIthMolly/VibeWithMommy shares her opinion on what women actually want and gives helpful tips on how to approach a first date as well as tips for physical intimacy, consent and how to seal the deal! In my dating life I have made quite a few men uncomfortable with my forwardness. I’ve had a guy make up an excuse and left the date after only 30 minutes of conversation. I admittedly knew we weren’t a match so I got pretty vulgar fairly quickly. What did I say? Fine I’ll tell ya. I told him one of my kinks was to get objectified and fucked like a fuckdoll from time to time. I think it freaked him out a bit…

Love to Love, Love to Fuck, Fuck to Love and Fuck to Fuck with VibeWithMolly / VibeWithMommy

Love to Love, Love to Fuck, Fuck to Love and Fuck to Fuck with VibeWithMolly / VibeWithMommy

I know for me, being with and loving one person has never felt right. As soon as I would commit to being in a relationship with someone I’d immediately put all of these expectations and restrictions on myself. No sex outside the relationship was assumed without even having a conversation about it.

Feeling No Longer Dirty at 30 With VibeWithMolly / VibeWithMommy

Feeling No Longer Dirty at 30 With VibeWithMolly / VibeWithMommy

I want to start off by saying that I can't stop crying.  I did it.  I'm 30 years old.  I've had a baby, I've finally figured out why I've been using drugs and treating myself and others the way I have for the past 15 years, and I faced the moment in my life that changed everything.  I had been refusing to think about, talk about or relive it since it happened.  

Drugged, Raped and Blamed Is the Name of the Game With VibeWithMolly / VibeWithMommy

Drugged, Raped and Blamed Is the Name of the Game With VibeWithMolly / VibeWithMommy

Drugged, Raped and Blamed Is the Name of the Game.

This was the night I lost my childlike view of the world.  This is the night I lost faith in others.  This is what sparked my hatred for men.  This is the night I first tried "alcohol" and this is the night I lost my virginity.  This is where my mess all began.  So if my mess is my message, then this is where my purpose lives.           

You know what's fucked up?  I think about this.  I think about this situation everytime I’m sober and alone.  When there is nowhere left for me to hide; I am here.  I am pressed up against the chain link fence, bra exposed, jeans pulled down around my ankles and consciousness fading in and out.  This is where I live when I’m alone.  My mind takes me back to that day.  My body follows and my sense of self starts to disappear.  

Stop, Put Down Your Phone and Be Afraid.

Stop, Put Down Your Phone and Be Afraid.

Stop, put down your phone and be afraid.

Something happened to me the other day.  Something clicked.  I felt release.  I released something that has been holding me down.  I realize me stressing about it and worrying about it was giving it power.  I was letting it win; win my life.  I want to take my life back.  I'm in control of my life.  I'm in control of my thoughts.  I'm in control of how I react in certain situations and I get to decide what makes me happy.  

Purposeful

Purposeful

Do you ever just look back at a time in your life and think, "Wow, I can't believe I let that happen to me" or "I can't believe I did that."  It almost feels like a dream, like it happened to someone else.  It's crazy what happens when you WAKE UP.  When you find a purpose; a reason, a reason to feel purposeful, a purposeful reason.  

I look back at her (me) and think, "Wow, you poor lost little soul."  Then I realize, "WOW!  I grew."  That's what I'm saying to myself.  That's the change I'm feeling; I grew into something.  

Fuck the Invisible Divide Between Us.

Fuck the Invisible Divide Between Us.

Where does this invisible competition come from? 

This competition I feel everyday.  

The thing that got me thinking was this invisible rule that woman are competing.  We are competing to be the skinniest, prettiest, smartest, most confident; best mom, best chef, and do it all with a smile.

What really got me thinking was how jealous I'd get when a girl was getting more attention than me from guys.  I'd almost ALWAYS start trying to find things wrong with her.  I'd say things to myself like, "Look how drunk she is, or she's wearing too much make up, or she looks like a slut and that's why guys want her."  It's crazy, I would think these things about other girls while not realizing that I was in fact DRUNK, wearing too much make up and dressed like a slut.  Like HELLO MOLLY look in the fucking mirror.

Story Time: To Ride or Die in Pai.

Story Time: To Ride or Die in Pai.

A lot of you know that I traveled to Southeast Asia a couple years ago.  I'd like to start by saying Southeast Asia is one of the most magical and whimsical places that I have ever been.  I had always dreamt of places like it; I never knew such beauty existed.

With that said, it is another place that is heaven for a girl like me.  The party NEVER stops.

Especially in Thailand.

Story Time: Mind Expanding Drugs With VibeWithMolly / VibeWithMommy

Story Time: Mind Expanding Drugs With VibeWithMolly / VibeWithMommy

It's frustrating reliving the past because I don't remember a lot of it.  There are so many lost minutes, hours, weeks and months.  Where was I?  What was I doing? Who was that person?

It started off feeling so mind expanding.  

Each time I took drugs like mushrooms, acid or ecstasy I felt such a deep connection to myself, to the people around me and to the earth as a whole.  As I look back at my life these past 15 years, I realize that I was chasing how I felt those first few times I took drugs.